Weekend Roundup

Some Marlins pieces I wrote for NBC Miami this week:

Marlins Reliever Spooked at 'Haunted' Hotel:

"Currently crapping my pants... Can't sleep... My room is def haunted," he tweeted late last night.

'He' being Steve Cishek. This isn't the first time a Marlin has freaked out over a ghost. As if a ghost would waste time with Steve Cishek while he could be haunting Emilio Bonifacio (little-known fact: ghosts hate Bonifacio, too).

Hanley Says E-Rod Shouldn't Be Fired:

Hanley Ramirez loves Edwin Rodriguez, and he doesn't care if the whole world knows it.

Having seen his teammate Logan Morrison reprimanded for endorsing hitting coach John Mallee after he was fired, Ramirez did the only logical thing: sing the manager's praises before owner Jeffrey Loria gets the chance to fire him for the team's poor performance in June.

Ramirez told MLB.com this week he is behind Rodriguez all the way. "I'm on his side," Ramirez said. "I've got his back, till the death, man."

It's adorable that Ramirez thinks Jeff Loria listens to anyone but the voices in his head (also his wife - how else do you explain The Cookbook?).

Marlins Tell LoMo to Go Easy on Loria:

LoMo said Loria also spoke to him about his comments, but "He's not really mad."

Riiiiight. On a related note, Yahoo's Jeff Passan basically called Loria an amalgam of Josef Stalin and Inspector Clouseau this week, and that sounds about right to me (even if he used Henry VIII as the analog, which is puzzling, since divorcing your wife and firing a coach are not nearly on the same plane).

And from friend-of-the-Diehards Janie, Chris Coghlan Demoted to Triple-A:

"He took it hard. He knows he belongs here. Just having a bad start," general manager Edwin Rodriguez said. "What we've seen from Chris Coghlan, he's going to be the first one to tell you that's not him swinging the bat."

Yes, that's not Chris Coghlan, it's Ben Grieve 2.0. Someone get him back on Twitter, the distraction clearly correlated to his not sucking.

Then there's the whole Johnson to the 60-day DL story. It figures that of the two team cornerstones to get injured in May, the one playing like ass came off the DL on day 16, while the other languishes in LoMo's zoo (or wherever the hell he lives). Sigh...

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Is there a ghost in my house?

A Milwaukee news outlet informs us today that the historic Pfister Hotel, where many baseball teams stay while playing the Brewers, is allegedly haunted. And of course there are juicy details aplenty:

A player for the Dodgers has been known to sleep with a baseball bat for protection after hearing odd noises. And two pairs of Florida Marlins players reportedly demand to share a room when they're in Milwaukee because they're afraid of ghosts.

This leaves an important question unanswered, though: which Marlins are making this demand? My guesses:

• Dan Uggla: Ghost interference would explain his errors in last year's All Star Game.
• Matt Lindstrom: Ditto last night's Alfonseca save (What, you haven't heard of the ghost of Grover Cleveland Alexander? Probably not, since it likely doesn't exist...)
• Renyel Pinto: Don't let the scowl fool you, he is very afraid.
• Ronny Paulino: Just a wild guess.
  

We've asked Marlins beat writer Joe Frisaro to get to the bottom of it. Don't let us down, Joe.


H/t: Deadspin, image via i-love-cartoons.com

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