Miami Marlins Upping the Crazy

According to just about every baseball beat writer, the Marlins are close to a deal with the Cubs for Carlos Zambrano¹. As of this moment, it appears that the Marlins would be giving up Chris Volstad. Also of note, the Cubs would be responsible for all of Zambrano's contract, save for around $3 million.

This is awesome². We'll get to the baseball aspect in a moment, but from a pure blogging and entertainment perspective this move is great. Big Z is well known for his rabid emotional outbursts, both good and bad. You can bet Ozzie Guillen will try to reign him in and focus on the good energy, but there should certainly be some explosions that will provide real entertainment value.

From a baseball sense, meh? I like the move. It was hard to expect anything out of Chris Volstad anymore, so that's not a loss. In fact, some are suggesting a parade just for being able to unload him. What does Carlos bring to the table? Well, he still has stuff. He does walk a lot of guys and give up the long ball (gee that does sound like Volstad, ugh), but he possesses a live fastball and movement on all of his pitches. He should be able to eat innings (pun intended) and maybe rack up 10 wins. Actually if you are a fan of Bill James projections, he has Zambrano going 10-10 with a 3.89 ERA in 181 IP in 2012. I'd do cartwheels if he can match that. Carlos probably would as well, except I doubt he can perform a proper cartwheel. Maybe he'll celebrate with a beer chug³.

¹I was away from Twitter for most of the day, so I don't know who had it first. Was it Ken Rosenthal? Fuck it, my money is on Ken's bowtie breaking the news.
²Unless you are a water/Gatorade cooler. If you are, then you may want to find a safe house and lay low.
³Beer chug is much better idea.