Confidential to Heath Bell

Hi Heath, it's Dave. You don't know me, but I want to help. Marlins fans would love to adore you, but if you insist on complaining about us (while at the same time walking 14% of the batters you face and racking up a 4.07 FIP), you will become a bigger pariah and laughingstock than Tony Sparano.

We could forgive you for decrying Giancarlo Stanton's paltry All-Star voting tally:

Bell said the Marlins' lack of national media coverage is no excuse for Stanton's paltry vote total. "I think the team is doing their part. I think it's the responsibility of the fan to vote for your favorite position player," he said. "If ESPN doesn't promote the Marlins and MLB doesn't promote the Marlins, I think the fans should."

But complaining about fans in your own park being more interested in the Heat's run to the NBA Finals while the Marlins are busy losing 7 out of their last 8 games is laughable.

"You can tell when there's a Heat game, there's nobody by our window," closer Heath Bell said of the window in the Marlins' outfield bullpen. "I know I got annoyed the last couple of times because it was 'Let's go He-eat!' I was like, 'Let's go Marlins!' I was yelling back at them."

To be fair, it is weird to think that someone would go to the Marlins Park Clevelander so they can watch a Heat game, but last time I checked, this is America, so that's perfectly legal.

You're new here, and maybe none of your teammates have mentioned this, but fans in South Florida only care about teams that are winning. If you really want to steal attention from the Heat, do something to help your teammates start hitting with runners in scoring position. The rest will take care of itself.